Today, wedding planning is all about customising and personalising – creating your dream ‘authentic’ day where you will announce – to each other and your closest friends and family – that you plan to formalise your future together. For most couples this starts a year (or so) long journey of planning and dreaming about your special day of celebration. Apart from the romance of writing your vows, imagining the moment when you say “I will”, choosing your music and practicing your opening dance; there are also practical issues that most couples will have to face. You will need to communicate and problem solve. Even the best planners are likely to go over budget, and so you might need to have conversations about balancing priorities and possibly cutting out some of the less important elements. These more difficult conversations are a way to understand your relationship better, and give you an idea about how you might deal with stress later in life as a married couple.
And so, while all the other advice you will get while planning your nuptials is important, there are a few other tips to keep in mind.
Your life will not stop; your work will continue to be stressful; your friends will still need your support; your family will keep bickering. Don’t lose sight of things in your life that you’re your attention. While wedding planning can bring you closer to your partner, it shouldn’t become all-encompassing. Remember that this day is only a step in your relationship, it isn’t the final goal. You have a lifetime of memories to create with your partner, and this is just one (albeit rather important) memory.
Don’t let your wedding change you or your relationship. You cannot and will not please everybody, so be clear on the ‘non-negotiable’s as a couple and be firm with those who have other ideas. However, be prepared to let go on the less important aspects. Perhaps involving your future mother-in-law will go a long way in cementing your future family relationships.
Remember the budget
When you are planning a wedding, the options are endless. Spend a little more on the things that are really important to you, and be creative with the rest. Wedding DIY adds character and will make your personality shine through on the day.
Honour your guests
Sure, this is your day. But your guests are spending a large amount of money to be there for you on this day. This doesn’t mean you need to spend a fortune on each person – show appreciation in little ways. They will know if you’ve been thoughtful or not.
Have a sense of humour
It doesn’t matter how thorough your planning, life has a way of throwing a few unexpected curve balls your way. You may forget the confetti. You may pose on a newly painted bench on your way into the church. The MC might cancel at the last moment. These things happen and they will create talking points for the rest of your life. How you handle the situation will determine how those conversations go. Try to laugh – imperfection adds character.